Sometimes I question why I do the things I do.
Take for example…
Last Monday night we had a soccer club parent meeting. When Zach’s coach asked if anyone wanted to be the parent team manager during the meeting, silence filled the school cafeteria. He asked again. My mouth opened up and the words came out, “Could I talk with you about it before agreeing to do it?” At the same time Coach was saying, “Yes, of course,” I was questioning myself, “Where did those words come from??? Seriously, Julie???” I honestly wasn’t planning on volunteering at all. I know my schedule, and it’s full enough. And I know that I really can’t take on one more thing.
But after talking it over with Doug (the coach), I hesitantly agreed to be the U17 Boys parent manager. Especially since Bill was behind me saying, “I’ll help you.”
And now I’m wondering why I said yes. I spent hours last night trying to decipher what my responsibilities are and what I need to do next. I was faced with deadlines that I wasn’t expecting, and I realized I would be the one registering our team for tournaments this fall. I truly felt like a deer in headlights…paralyzed. I went to bed fretting, “Why did I say yes to this?”
I woke up early to tackle a few more things this morning. Then I had to walk away from it all, and give myself a break (and most importantly, give it to God!). I had 33 emails in my “soccer inbox” when I arrived home from work today. It wouldn’t be such a big deal if I wasn’t working two other full-time jobs and taking care of my family already. 🙂 Sometimes I really question my sanity!
And as I close out this day, I just received an email from someone in the soccer club encouraging me. That is just what I needed right now. I know this will all get better, as these critical deadlines will be passing soon. I just pray God aligns everything together to make it happen smoothly. There is NOTHING I can control right now, and that, my friends, may drive me crazy!
It’s no wonder today’s devotional was about trusting God…
“Trust Me in the depths of your being. It is there that I live in constant communion with you. When you feel flustered and frazzled on the outside, do not get upset with yourself. You are only human, and the swirl of events going on all around you will sometimes feel overwhelming. Rather than scolding yourself for your humanness, remind yourself that I am both with you and within you.”
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