I grew up in a loving home. It was a safe and secure place at home. I loved our home. My parents loved me and showed their love to me in numerous ways. I grew up feeling secure in their love. I loved my brothers and I know they loved me. We siblings are still very close today. But somewhere along the way, insecurity crept in when it came to other relationships …was a pretty enough? …was I skinny enough? …was a good enough for each sport? …what does he/she think of me? …was I smart enough? I began to compare myself to others…either I was “above them” in a certain area, or “below them.” Either way, it was unfair to them, and unfair to me.
I also remember how I would feel when my friends would do something without me, or if I wasn’t able to do something they were all doing together. I felt so left out, and the feeling of not being included by them I thought for sure would kill me. I would do almost anything not to be “left out.” That’s a form of insecurity, and that got me into trouble more times than I can count.
I find that I still today have a tendency to compare myself with others, but I’ve learned I now can catch myself when I do, and tell myself to stop it. It’s ridiculous…and here’s a prime example… Honestly, I’ve always hated my thighs. I still don’t care for them…I inherited my mom’s thighs, and bless Ali’s heart, she’s inherited mine. She doesn’t like hers either. 🙁 So when I see a woman who has skinnier thighs than I do, I become just a tad-bit envious and wish I had “thighs like hers.” Hello??? If God wanted me to have “thighs like hers,” then He would have given them to me. But He gave me these thighs. And I can do what I can to keep them looking as good as they possibly can with exercise and etc., but I’m built the way God built me. End of story.
So, I am working on when I start to compare myself, I stop and say, “Thank you God for making me, me. I am beautifully and wonderfully made in Your image.” The comparing game stops right then and there.
I have watched Ali work through a situation this week that would have killed me at her age. Two of her best friends went to Florida together this week…without her. I praised her for how she’s handling being “left out.” I asked her how she was doing with them going, and she responded with, “I’m used to it. It doesn’t bother me anymore.” I shared with her how it would have devastated me, and how I would have been so jealous at her age. She looked at me like I had three eyeballs and asked, “Really?” Shaking my head yes, I realized then that she doesn’t have the insecurities that I had at her age. Thank you, Lord, for that. She may have others, and if so, I’m sure they’ll surface. (I pray God keeps her from them though.) But for now, I can come alongside of her in these important teenage years to encourage her, love her and help her feel as secure as possible. I would love to help her avoid some of the mistakes I made because of my insecurities.
And since we both have Jesus in our lives, there’s no reason to be insecure anymore. We really have everything we need in Him. AMEN! So, no matter what size your thighs are, as a work in progress, I’ll be thanking God He gave me mine, and thanking God He gave you yours! After all, what would we be like if we didn’t have any in the first place? We should just be thankful for them…period!
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