Living Real Is Forgiving Ourselves When We Mess Up

by | Oct 26, 2017 | 31 Days Of Living A Real Life

I did something that wasn’t so smart the other day. My mind was full of all I had to do, and I felt I was racing against the clock. I threw my bags onto the passenger seat of my vehicle, holding tight to my driver’s-side door. As my hand lessened its grip, the wind caught my door and BANG! It hit the car’s door next to me.

Are you serious? Did this really just happen right now?

I couldn’t believe it. I was trying to be so careful in the wind, knowing full well how it could cause a car door to fly wide open. This is the last thing I needed that afternoon. I grabbed my door and pulled it back. Examining the damage it left on my neighbor’s car door, it didn’t look good. Two small scrapes appeared on the bright red paint. My heart sank.

It didn’t take long for a rash of negative, self-degrading accusations to permeate my thoughts. Can’t you do anything right? How in the world did you allow that to happen? You’ve caused this mess, now what are you going to do? And, the one that wrenched my stomach the most: Your careless actions have affected another… This is not what he/she needed today either. 

When accidents happen or when we mess up, what do we say to ourselves?

Tears filled my eyes. I sat for a moment in my loathsomeness. In that moment a question popped into my mind…

“Is this how someone who lives a real life talks to herself?”

No, it’s not. Or, at least it shouldn’t be.

I quickly changed the words that filled my brain, and reminded myself this was an accident. I didn’t mean to let the door slip. Even though it was my fault, it wasn’t something I set out to do. I asked God to forgive me.

But if we own up to our sins, God shows that He is faithful and just by forgiving us of our sins and purifying us from the pollution of all the bad things we have done. 1 John 1:9 VOICE

I’m thankful God forgives completely. If He does, why is it sometimes so hard for me to forgive myself? Is it hard for you too?

Friend, is there something you’ve been beating yourself up over? Is there something you’ve done you just can’t get let go of? What’s that one thing you’re having a hard time forgiving yourself for?

There’s a saying that goes something like this…

There’s nothing you can do to make Jesus love you more and there’s nothing you can do to make Him love you less. He loves you. Period.

No matter what you’ve done or haven’t done, you’re loved by Jesus. He forgives you when you ask Him to. And, the best thing is, once we’re forgiven, He doesn’t hold those things against us any longer.

And, we shouldn’t hold them against ourselves any longer either.

Living real is forgiving ourselves when we mess up.

Living real is forgiving ourselves when we mess up.

Whatever it is, give it to God then let go of it. He’ll forgive you, and you can too. Sure, forgiving ourselves isn’t easy if we aren’t used to doing it, but freedom comes when we do.

I left my business card on the window of my neighbor’s car, asking for his/her forgiveness too. We’ll see how this accident all plays out, but God used it as a big lesson for me in forgiving myself. I hope it encourages you also!

I’m praying for all of us in this today. God bless you, friend!




We’re on Day 26 of 31 Days of Living a Real Life. What a joy it is to have you here! If you’d like to catch up on previous posts in this series, you can do so here.

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  1. Cindy Wilkins

    Isn’t it crazy that we are so much less forgiving to ourselves than we are to others? Sadly it is easier for me to recall the times I’ve messed up than it is the times I’ve succeded! And even sadder I can go back years and years and still bring up times I failed. I have been trying to let them go and I sure look forward to that freedom when I finally and forever put them all in the hands that were pierced for me so that I can live forgiven! As you can tell, your words continue to resonate with me! Thank you for being willing to share them with me!

    • Julie Lefebure

      I’m right there with you, Cindy. Your words captured my attention tonight… “forever put them all in the hands that were pierced for me so that I can live forgiven!” Amen. That’s powerful right there! Thank you. You’ve encouraged my heart in this tonight. I appreciate you! Have a blessed weekend, friend!



  1. 31 Days Of Living A Real Life - Julie Lefebure - […] Day 26 Living Real is Forgiving Ourselves When We Mess Up […]

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