After a complicated and rocky week, two scripture passages have spoken to me this morning…
Psalm 62:5-6 Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
2 Thessalonians 3:3 But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen you and protect you from the evil one.
Amen, and amen! God is faithful.
After a joyous weekend last weekend, I should have expected trouble from the enemy this week…but I didn’t. If you read my post about Ali being diagnosed with a mild head trauma, then you know some of what has gone on this week.
It’s always stressful for me trying to be in two places at once…at the Mission, feeling I need to be home to care for my family, and at home, feeling guilty for not being at the Mission. I guess that’s just the way I’m wired. And that’s what I was feeling most of this week. Looking back now, I should have spent more time tending to Ali at home instead of letting the guilt feelings of not being at the Mission overtake me. I need to learn that no matter if my children are sick at 8 or 18 years old, they want me home with them. Lesson learned this week…again. (Will I ever master this parent thing?)
When my children are ill, I don’t do well. I mix in a combination of praying and worrying. I did it in the fall when Ali was so sick, and I did it this week. I don’t like the helpless feeling of not being able to do what it takes to heal my children…or even for knowing what to do!
Ali was in bed most of the week. Her head hurt most of the time. The pain pills would knock her out, which I felt was both good and bad. She felt nauseated most of the time, and it seemed as if the anti-nausea medicine wasn’t doing anything. Finally on Friday, because she seemed to be getting worse and not getting better, I called our doctor’s nurse and she suggested to get Ali in to be looked at. There was one opening at 1pm, with the nurse practitioner of the office. We took it.
Ali was in so much pain. After explaining everything to nurse practitioner, she thought maybe it was a migraine. I knew better. This wasn’t a migraine. My gut was telling me she was still feeling this way due to being hit in the head on Sunday. I had talked with a friend of mine that morning who’s son had a concussion recently and it took him a couple of months to get back to normal and be without pain. Normal every day things that he tried to do would cause his head to hurt, and seemed to set him back a step. I asked the nurse practitioner about a CT scan, as one was not done in the E.R. Monday night. She thought maybe we should get one done, just to be sure. She gave Ali a shot for pain, which was painful in itself.
To the hospital we went for the CT scan. The wait time was almost unbearable. Trying to keep a good attitude and stay positive was becoming more and more difficult to do. Ali was still in pain. Finally she was called back, they did the scan and we waited for the results. We were put on the phone with the nurse practitioner with the news the scan was clear. Thank God! She said for Ali to keep up with her pain pills and rest, and to call back in if she got worse.
After arriving home, we both collapsed. We laid on her bed and watched past episodes of a t.v. show she likes. We also watched Princess and the Frog…a movie I had never seen. (Very cute, by the way!) It was nice to just do nothing but spend that time with Ali, doing what she wanted to do.
And then I crashed yesterday. Have you ever had times in your life where you have lots of people around you, but yet you feel so alone? That was me this week. Times like that are when I miss Mom the most. She was never too busy for me, and she always understood. Her words and compassion were always healing for me. I miss her so much.
Ali was feeling a little better yesterday, so she went to a nearby town for their annual celebration. She came home last night after fireworks with, you guessed it…a headache. She’s still sleeping this morning. I pray God gives us a restful and peaceful day together today. And I pray Ali is on the mend, and is not set back because of her activity yesterday.
I’m clinging to the above scripture passages this morning. Even in my lowest of lows, I know Jesus is with me. Even when we may not have anyone else, we have Jesus. Thank God we have Jesus! Thank God He is faithful!
I pray you have a blessed Sunday, and I pray you see God’s faithfulness in your life today.