I realize these latest posts on my blog aren’t very “happy”. It’s difficult to fake being happy when you are grieving. Please bear with me as I work through my grief.
This weekend was a very difficult weekend for me and for my family. I can only imagine what Brian, Alex and Jill’s extended family are going through. We are all trying to comprehend and get a grasp on Jill’s death. We can’t seem to do it. Zach asks, “Why did this have to happen to Jill?” Ali asks, “Why did God allow this to happen?” Bill and I are asking the same two questions. As I cried and prayed myself to sleep Saturday night, the last thing I remember praying is, “Lord, I don’t understand this. But I know you do. Please help us through this.”
I think I’ve figured out why I’m struggling so much with Jill’s death, besides the fact of losing a dear friend…1) I was the one who found her unconscious, 2) her age, and 3) she was a healthy, vibrant woman!
I had time to prepare for both my mother’s and father’s deaths. I loved my parents so much, and I thank God he gave me time to prepare. But can anything really quite prepare you for the death of a loved one? I don’t think so. Both of my parents were older. Dad died when he was 71. Mom died when she was 74. Both of them had some health problems. Dad had detoriorated lungs from smoking for years. Mom had a damaged heart, which her doctors say was probably caused by Influenza A. Jill’s death is different. She was young, she was healthy, and her aneurysm was such a shock.
I’m thankful for my family and friends who are standing with me and praying for me, my family and for Jill’s family. I feel it will help us, as a family, to reach out and help Brian and Alex in all ways we can during the next few days, weeks, months and years. For now, that’s our plan…to stand with them, to lift them in prayer and trust God through this.
(For those of you wh
o have been praying for Brian and Alex, I know sometimes it helps to put a face with a name. The soccer picture here has Brian and Alex in it…Brian is the dad in the back wearing gray and black, and Alex is in front on the far right.)
Thank you for standing with all of us during this very difficult time!
Julie
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