As you see, I haven’t written a post for a couple of days…it’s been a difficult few days dealing with Jill’s death. I haven’t felt like writing…in fact, I haven’t “felt” like doing much at all, except for sleeping! I slept most of yesterday…I spent from 9am-1:30pm on the couch, in and out of sleep. If you know me at all, you know that is not like me to do that! I would NEVER dream of “wasting” a day like that…but I think I needed a day like that after experiencing the week that I experienced with Jill’s trauma, her hospitalization, her death and her funeral. All of that happened in one week’s time! Last Wednesday morning when I was at her home, when Jill was unconscious…I never thought that a week later I would be sitting at her funeral!
I think I hit my breaking point yesterday, and I had a huge meltdown here at home. Then this morning I think I had a small breakthrough after Bill and I sat with Brian (Jill’s husband) at their home. We were wanting to be there for Brian and wanted figure out what he and Alex may need in the short term and the long term. It was good for me and for Bill to be there with Brian, and I hope it was good for Brian that we were there too.
There are so many people who want to help them…with whatever their needs are. So many want to give back in some way to thank and honor Jill for the amazing person she was, and to be there for Brian and Alex as they work through their grief and try to pick up the pieces and move forward. All three of them, Jill, Brian and Alex, have touched the lives of so many people. They have been true friends to us and to many, many others.
As we all try to pick up the pieces and move forward, which I know Jill would want us to do, it is difficult. Moving forward does not mean forgetting Jill. Moving forward means I have memories of her tucked away in my heart that I will be able to carry with me throughout the rest of my life. With the ways Jill touched me, I can touch others. She made this earth a better place…we can too when we take the “things” she gave to us (like love, compassion, caring, humor, fun, understanding, trustworthiness, loyalty and integrity) and use them to help others.
I’m so thankful God gave each of us a memory! We that knew Jill will always have the memories of the times we’ve spent with her. I encourage you to continue to share your memories of Jill with others…continue to have her memory live on…continue to allow yourself to relive the great memories of her in your mind.
Please continue to pray for Brian and Alex, and all of Jill’s and Brian’s family and friends for God’s to surround each of them with His never-ending comfort and love.
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